I hate my new apt... LB

I really hate my apartment!

On the real folks... moving is for the birds.  The next time I decide to move from one apt to the next I am going to burn everything I own and start from scratch.  Taking with me only my purses and shoes and assorted lip glosses as I have an addiction to them all.

I signed the lease on what is the 2nd smallest apt in Philadelphia, PA.  On the surface it looks nice, but when you actually spend more than 2 minutes inside you see the dream slowly unravel.  I should have known things weren't right, the day I recieved the keys.  As that was the day I learned I had NO WATER.  (that was only AFTER a trip to the bathroom)  Oh yea, and none of my appliances work. 

See, what had happened was.  I rented the model apartment.  So it included a few more bells and whistles than the other units.  But like most models, it was all a front.  None of the existing appliances were hooked up to plumbing or even plugged in.  I also had doors that didn't open, because this apartment was never intended to be lived in.  That was until they sold it to me! 

But I can't blame them, I used the same rationale to rent this apartment as I do for clothing and shoes.  Can I fit in it? Most importantly, does it look good?  Perhaps next time I will come up with a different set of criteria. 

This picture is a clear and precise depiction of how big my place is.  My apt is the small little room on the side where the little pink arrow is pointing to and that llittle girl, represents God having a good laugh at me. 

Lets start with my kitchen

My fridge:  I've seen coolers with no ice in the middle of a july cookout keep food cooler than this thing.  My freezer only keeps meats, vegetables and icecream cool - NOT FROZEN!  My freezer smells like the meat section of one of the questionable markets in bad neighborhoods.  Whenever you open the freezer it actually smells like warm meat. 

Moving onto the living room

The problem is not the size of my living room.
(pictured to the left.)
I have attempted TWICE to have furniture delivered to my apt.  Both attempts failed miserably.  Mainly because my apt is not life sized.  Two adults could not fit inside the same room of my apt comfortably.  (unless they were naked and had planned on rubbing against each other with every move they make)

The problem is this.  Please refer to picture below.  Don't let this picture fool you it is very inaccurate.  The blue arrow depicts my front door which could be no wider than about a foot.  The second red arrow is the entry way into my kitchen which is actually NARROWER than the front door.  The angle makes it look quite opposite.  Due to the space  - most couches need to come through both entry ways in order to pivot into the living room but when you have Alice in wonderland sized doors.  It makes that impossible.   

Considering my current dilemma,  I found a solution... doll furniture! I saw this finely crafted doll furniture online.  It's longest piece is about 6 inches long, and I think, with good spacial planning I can work it out.  I found this lovely set below for only $45.95 plus shipping and handling.  The couch length is equivalent to half a $5 footlong subway sandwich.    I really think it's a steal!  I also heard pottery barn kids is having a sale on bean bag chairs. 

 Currently this is the only piece of REAL SIZED living room furniture I own...  This lawnchair is the bomb.  I'm considering just buying a few more of these.  It's like being at an outdoor concert... everyday!

All in all, I cry every night, because I live in a sham of a apartment.  Month after month I pay for appliances that don't work.  A flat screen I will never be able to truly enjoy because I have no furniture to watch it on and my security alarm goes off in the middle of the night for no reason.  Causing me to wake up ready to kill only to find it was a false alarm.   

LB